LIFE UNLEASHED

We took a bit of a gamble booking into an American run Agritourismo in Italy.  Shouldn’t we pick a more authentic experience?  Shouldn’t someone’s mother be cooking for us? Well, as it turns out, the best food we had in Italy was made just like Mama used to make, provided your Mama is a 20 something chef named Jason from New York. 

First off the setting of there Agritourismo was perfect.  Surrounded by rolling hills their gorgeous estate was the perfect place to get away from the noise and hustle of the towns.  The classic old stone home  was so well cared for and had all the modern conveniences you could want and a beautiful and refreshing pool to relax by.  The couple running the place, Ashley and Jason, were the best hosts we had in all of Italy and were always on hand too recommend things to do and place to see.  The concern on Ashley’s face if she saw us finish our wine glass as she ran to fetch the bottle from the fridge was fantastic.

When it came  to dinner we didn’t really know what to expect other than they were big believers in the slow food movement which we have also always followed.  Slow food is basically the opposite of fast food where time and effort are put into to making things from scratch with the freshest possible ingredients.  It is alo the art of enjoying the meal and taking time to savour the flavours and your company rather than scarffing everything down so that you can sit blankly in front of the TV.  Jason took the idea of slow food to the extreme.  Many of the ingredients he had grown right in his own garden.  Others he had travelled the countryside to find local providers of.  We were in for a treat.

Jason too simple ingredients such as fresh zucchini and just by taking the time to shave it thin and season it with olive oil and a sprinkle of salt and pepper before finishing it with fantastic aged Parmigiana.  He did the same sort of thing in providing us with garden fresh lima beans and pecorino.  Jason surprised our taste buds with 30 year old aged balsamic vinegar which he described with something akin to love as he drizzled it over a light omelette.  In New York, Jason said, you can never spread pig fat on toast and have people eat it but in Italy he served us a pig fat that had been aged carefully in a marble box before spreading it thinly on crostini.  It was amazing.   As for the mains, serving me roast rabbit one day and then veal the next will make me one happy puppy.  How did he know two of my favourite things?

 If you plan to get out to Marche east of Tuscany you must go to La Tavola Marche.  It’s perfecto! (www.latavolamarche.com)

“Get your motor runnin‘.  Head out on the highway.”  There is no better way to see the Tuscan countryside than on a motor bike -  All 125 cc’s of it screaming up hills and around windy corners.  As an Italian co-worker of mine told me - “Us Italians, we like our roads like we like our woman…CURVY!”  We spent the day driving past olive groves and vineyards, past castles and over hilltops.  We stopped when could to sample the fine foods and wine, admire the awesome views and walk through the ancient battlements.  The effect of the day was made even cooler by Lisa’s idea to wear 60’s inspired blue jean bell bottoms.  We WERE Easy Rider!  Scooters are so prevalent in Italy that you can actually feel cool riding one.  Especially if you park it next to a 1500 cc BMW bike so and pretend that we rode in style.  Go mad motor scooter, GO! 

We even did most of our riding on the right side of the road, which in Italy, is the RIGHT side of the road.  However, my Australian brainwashing did have me drive off a one way street on the LEFT side of the road. That’s one more of my nine lives gone. The only consolation was that the screaming man coming towards us on a very fast moving Ducati would have assumed we were British. 

You take a bit of a risk when you book yourself into a hayloft!  Luckily, the Tuscans know how to make a  11th  century Hayloft pretty inviting.  Firstly, they build the Hayloft right in the middle of the Chianti wine region, allowing us to sample the finest Chianti Classico our meagre backpacker budget would allow.  Secondly, they plant olive trees all around the hayloft and then press the olives into a fine olive oil which they supply you free of charge.  Thirdly, they make your hayloft into a 2 story fully equipped apartment with flat screen television and wireless internet.  Fourth, they put in a pool right outside your front door.  Fifth, they get three huge (but friendly) dogs named Shampoo, Shanti and Sheela, to greet you every time you come through the front gate.  Last but not, least they drench everything in a healthy dose of Tuscan sunshine.  Perfect. 

(Check out Casa Mezzuola at:  www.mezzuola.com)

Italians are known for their love of food but the one food they love more than anything is Gelato (Italian ice cream).  There are Gelato bars on practically every corner of the major cities and even the smallest towns will have a couple Gelaterias.  If you have never had good homemade Italian Gelato you have simply not lived.  

We tried as hard as we could to not have the same flavour twice.  We had….

Hazelnut, Honey Cream, Pistachio, Coffee, Banana, Sour Cherry, Chocolate, Nutella, Tartufo, Mora Berry, Raspberry, Lemon Basil, Stratichella, Mint Stratichella, Dark Chocolate Cherry, Coffee, Zuppa Englese, Strawberry, Mixed Berry, Cherry Cream, Chocolate Fondante, Biscotti, Rose, Peach, Peaches and Cream, Peach and Orange, Orange Cream, Fior De Latte with Sesame, Fresh Mint, Kiwi, Caramel Pear, Green Apple,  Saffron, Fior De Latte Raspberry, Zabione Vin Santo, Saffron, Cinnamon, Cappuccino and Rum, Blueberry, White Mint, Liquorice, Toasted Pine Nuts and Cream, Ricotta and Lemon, Zabaglione, Lemon, Orange, Dark Chocolate

We visited some of the best places in Italy according to what we read in guidebooks and researched on line.  We kept a log and rated them on taste and quality.  Yes, I can make gluttony seem like a hobby.  If anyone is coming to Italy and needs a tip on where to get your best gelato fix just ask us - we‘ll hook you up. 

Oh, and please whatever you do, do not come to Italy and buy pre-made ice cream bars in corner stores.  I have taken to randomly slapping  the few foreigners I have seen do this.  So one day if you are in Rome sucking on a Creamcicle Brand frozen treat, don’t be surprised if one of us races out of the shadows, knocks your lame popsicle from your hand and gives you a smackin‘.

From Rome we headed south to the much heralded Amalfi Coast.  We spent a couple of days in the tiny and heavily touristy town of Positano which spirals  down the cliffs towards beach.  It was nice (ok, REALLY nice:)) but we kept looking up and thinking; “I wonder what the views would be like from up there?”  Up there was the tiny village of Nocelle perched on a cliff top some 300 meters straight above Positano.  We booked into a fantastic little B&B (www.villadellaquercia.com) and had a view all the way up and down the coast from our balcony.  No tourists, no vehicles, just peace and quite and our great view. 

We had heard rumours from fellow travellers about a great hike starting from Nocelle called the … Degli Dei (walk of the Gods).  Now here was the view you could die for…quite literally.  The walk clung to a narrow cliff face with a sheer rock wall on one side and a long drop on the other.    Clouds drifted by, birds flew around below you and you could see for miles.   At a few points it was Vertigo inducing because of the peripheral vision of the ocean so far below.  At other parts of the walk it would wind into gullies where you could get a break from the blistering sun in a cool grotto. 

There are time’s traveling that you have to stop and think …”Man, am I lucky”. 

This was definitely one of them.

The word for trouble in Italain is spelled L-I-S-A!

Upon entering a fast food restaurant I was immediately told:

“Madame. In Line please”. (All I was trying to do was read the menu before deciding where to eat)

You’d think I would learn but alas, in a moment of rebellious foolhardiness I approached a fruit stand and picked up a Pink Lady (apple) to buy:”

“No touch-a the fruit!”

The culmination of my troublemaker status came while we were picnicking in a park in the town of Frascat (near Rome)i. Our ignorance of the Italian language prevented us from reading the “Keep of the Grass” sign. Along waddled an old lady who started up in a pitch close to that of an ambulance siren. Now, as I mentioned we do not speak Italian but this is what we infer that she said

“Ma Ma Mia! Why you walk on the grass? This-a lawn, it’s-a been in ma family for sixteen generations. Why? Why you bend-a the blades? Why you hav-a to sit on it?!?! We post-a da sign. Still you bend-a the blades. Six-a-teen generations! Why? Wwwwwwwhhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyy?”

So as you can see, L-I-S-A clearly spells trouble in Italy.

Note: We know this post is utterly offensive  (but we couldn’t resist) and for that we apologize wholeheartedly to our many Italian friends and in fact to the whole country of Italy. The Italian people have been wonderful hosts and always ready with a smile. Please take this with humou as at no point was anyone particularly mean to me.  A bit of scolding is nothing 2 or 3 gelati won’t fix J